How To Save Your Marriage
Posted on November 23, 2010
SPICE: Yes, this post is called “How to Save your Marriage.” Why? Because that is what I’m going to teach you right now! Pay close attention.
When your partner announces to you they are going on a diet, what should you say?
A. “Thank goodness! You definitely need to.”
B. “Again?”
C. “Really? What makes you think you need to diet?”
Correct answer: C.
When you know your partner is on a diet and they order a burger and fries at the restaurant, what should you say?
A. “Is that on your diet? Honey?”
B. “Give up already?”
C. “Yum, sounds good.”
Correct answer: C
When your partner complains they haven’t lost much yet, what should you say?
A. “Yeah, I can tell.”
B. “You need to work out more.”
C. “What?! I think you look amazing! Come here!”
Correct answer: C
SUGAR: This is great. Where was this when I needed the guide for my dearest one? I recall one Lenten season when I announced that I was giving up chocolate for 40 days & nights….my husband’s first response….”What’s your back up plan?”
SPICE: GRRRRRRR, that’s just not right! Correct answer? “What an amazing sacrifice that is for you, sweetheart!”
Here’s a case study for you, which happened right here, yesterday! Pay attention, y’all.
Girlfriend of Spice opens fridge at work and pulls out lunch which boyfriend had packed for her. She opens it and is upset that it’s a VERY small portion of last night’s meal. Discussion ensued about how she’s on Weight Watchers and that he probably was “trying to help.” All women within earshot agreed that “trying to help” is a major partner mistake. “
What should he have done?
A. Pack her a portion identical it his.
B. Pack her a salad and carrot sticks instead?
C. Lovingly tell her that during her diet, he will let her make her own lunch so that he doesn’t screw it up. And offer to take on some other chore for her since he’s no longer doing that one. And ask her if there is anything he can buy for her? Cashmere sweater, perhaps?
Correct answer: C
Well, that ends this advice session. Perhaps you’ve learned something from today’s post.
Any other suggestions are very welcome (and quite fun, so please feel free to share!)